why LOVE BOMBING feels good (and how to resist)
the science of love bombing
On today's episode, we are talking about love bombing, what it is, what it does to your body, the signs that you may be in the process of being love bombed, and ultimately how to avoid being love bombed.
A few disclaimers for today's edition: everything we're talking about is descriptive and some prescriptive. During the prescriptive parts where I tell you “this is how you may avoid being love bombed, I want us all to keep in mind that any and all strategies that we try to implement only decreases the chances bad things happening. It's not a 100% foolproof thing.
A person who wants to hurt you will find a way to hurt you, and that is no measure of how worthy you are of being hurt. That is a measure of their desire and willingness to hurt you. You are not a better or worse woman for being love bombed or avoiding love bombing. A person who wants to hurt you will do their best to hurt you. Point blank period.
We are going to give ourselves and other women a lot of grace in today's class. At the end of the day, we are observing patterns, connecting the dots, and strategizing a better way for us to move in the world so that, hopefully, we can all have better outcomes. And we are doing that by discussing how love and falling in love affects the female body and how love bombers hijack this process of falling in love to fool women into thinking that they are offering true love resulting in a healthy and respectful relationship. We will also cover the ways we can combat love bombing by being more in touch with ourselves and engaging in certain behavior that will give us more clarity to discern love bombers from people who are really interested in getting to know us.
love bombing 101
I feel like love bombing is on everyone's minds right now because of what happened to this one big influencer who is undergoing her own controversy with regards to her partner cheating on her, and she told her millions of followers about it as it was happening in real time and now that we've had almost two weeks of discourse to digest everything, and there's new information coming out, a lot of people are now analyzing the turn of events of her romantic life.
The discourse machine of social media concluded that she was love bombed, and one of the signs that they pointed out was how fast their relationship progressed. Between a span of months, this influencer met the guy, they started dating, they get engaged, married, and she is now carrying his child. All this happened within the span of months. However, they did know each other virtually or through friends of friends before they started officially dating.
Anyway, the discourse machine of social media concluded that she was love bombed and that's why she let her guard down. That's why she moved so fast with him. And there's all these think pieces, essays, video essays, compilations of the things that she said when describing her relationship… and it does point to love bombing.
I saw this meme and it said:
I fear it love bombing will work on me because I’d think it's normal.
—(paraphrased)
